Did I Really Just Say That?

Every Monday my phone reminds me that part of my responsibility as a staff person at my church is to visit the hospitals. I really don't like visiting the hospitals. Don't get me wrong, I love to help people, serve people, and pray for people. However, when I'm at the hospital I feel completely out of my element. I'm usually full of optimism and excitement and it's hard to express my true character to a 65 year old man who is dying of cancer. It is really hard for me to adjust my demeanor to match the hospital environment. On top of this, 90% of the time when I walk into a hospital room, I've never met the person or their family and I feel rather unprepared (relationally and mentally) for what I'm about the encounter. There have been moments when I've knocked and been allowed in only to find someone in a state of undress...talk about awkward.

Because it's Monday, I walked into a local hospital to visit a man in his 50's who was having a baseball size tumor removed from his abdomen. When I walked into the room, he was no where to be found, but several members of his family where circled up visiting. Having never met them (imagine that) I introduced myself and began to find out that the surgery had gone well and they were finishing up in the operating room. We visited a few more minutes and I prayed for their family and a fast recovery. When I was leaving the room, I said, "I hope you have a good time. See you later" and walked out.

Ever said anything and in your mind you responded, "What did you just say? You idiot! Did you really just say that?!" As I crossed the threshold of that hospital room that is exactly what I thought..."Did I really just tell a worried, anxious family who were awaiting news from the operating room about their husband, father, brother, and friend to 'have a good time'"? In the words of Amy and Seth on Weekend Update, "Really? Did I really?".

This is a classic example of my usually positive attitude having a hard time adjusting to my environment...no one has a "good time" in the hospital and yet that is what I blurted out. Shesh.

It is also an example of being ill-prepared for what God had in store for me in that hospital room.

Proverbs 29:20 says, "Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him."

In my haste and desire to get on with my day, I fumbled the ball and found myself wishing I would have had the sensitivity to be more intentional with my words. As I walked to my car shaking my head, I was reminded that we're called to choose our words wisely even it means not having "a good time."